Double appointments and peeing in a cup!

Is there a worse hell on earth than the pediatrician's office? 

Maybe if you have one of those super calm, easygoing kids, a visit to the doctor isn't so bad.  At least it means you get out of the house.  If that's the case, you can stop reading right now.  But for most of us, it's the kind of visit that makes you sweat... literally drenching my clothes trying to keep my kids on their best doctor behavior.  So what do I do because I don't have a brain...I schedule a double appointment.  I mean knock them out at one time right?  Smart if you are trying to save gas but STUPID if you are not!  And this day I was the later!

I've tried several different recommended tactics to prepare my son for the doctor.  I've done the emotion coaching and the fair warnings ('tomorrow, we get to go to the doctor!' and 'in five minutes, we get to go to the doctor!').  Nothing has worked.  My now three-year-old gets riled up about it as soon as I squeak out the word doctor-- whether it's a week or two minutes before the appointment.

So how do we survive it?  Can he have [two packages of] candy in the car?  Sure.  Dont judge me!  Can he hold onto my phone and look at pictures while waiting for the doctor.  Yep.  Anything to calm him down and prevent the red-faced crying that I (and the doctor and nurses) are bound to eventually endure.  But the fun has just begun!  The real treat is when the physical exam begins.  If you ever need help pinning your child's arms and legs down so the doctor can peek into his ears or look at his throat, call me.  I've had loads of experience with it.  But then the doozy came, see since he is now three he has to pee in the cup!  I had to kinda giggle...I mean and break out in a sweat.  I have a nine month old who is hanging on my hip trying his best to rip my shirt off cause he is hungry.  Both my kids are naked for their exams and you want me to get my kid to pee in a cup?  Picture me in a small tiny bathroom with a screaming hungry nine month old, whipping out the boob so people will stop giving me the "oh my gosh you are starving your baby stare" all while kneeling on the floor helping my three year old aim into a cup!  Now that my friends is a sweaty mama moment!  Hunter was a trooper...he thought it was great and we laughed so hard!  So I learned that peeing in a cup can change a doctors appointment and make his doctor phobia disappear.  Who would have thought it could be so easy!  Well that is until you get home and he thinks he can pee in bowls, cups or buckets. Yep...fun times!

Here's hoping we won't be heading back there anytime soon or I may need to take Valium first!

Boy do I need Grace...so pray for that please!

So I am not writing this to be hateful....I write mostly to vent or share or ask for prayers.  And today I am asking for both Grace and prayers, guess that means I need you to pray for Grace.  When I married my husband I knew he had EX's and I knew he had children.  I came into the relationship with EX's and no children.  But boy I wish I knew then what I know now.  See I thought I could change the world.  I thought that I could smooth the relationship between the ex wife and have this fantastic relationship with the children whom I love dearly, but today the relationship is not what I had envisioned at the beginning.  This ex is not like anyone I had ever encountered.  I will ask for prayers for her as well!  We had to get some child support papers modified today because one of the children turned 18.  This child of hers my husband adopted when they married.  As they signed the modification papers she says to him that they would like to terminate the adoption and have been wanting to for years.  You see this is the deal...she has been wanting to for years and she chose not to because that would mean she could no longer receive support for that child.  So for the last three years she has collected from us and we have STRUGGLED to pay.......why?  She didnt want Dan to be her father for three years....what! You see where I am going here.  She has been laughing right to the bank this whole time!  This is just one story of many many.  Many tears, many sleepless nights and many many dollars!  I am angry to say the least at her audacity, but not surprised.  This is just however another twist to the knife that has been in our spine for a long time.  So this is where I am, please pray for me cause I need to find the grace I know I have, and at this very minute it's no where in sight.  And I am also asking you to pray for her and that she finds peace in her life.  Also for anyone that is judging me right now for writing this please forgive me...it's been a long hard road.

Love does exist!

The movies screens portray love as a crazy romantic race through traffic while a man comes from out of nowhere and rescues you from near death collision.....And a kiss that tilts worlds is seen at the top of a high rise or at the beach with the saltwater covering your toes.

But this man that I married? He’s never dashed through traffic and saved me from a near death collision.  

There was that one night when he read me the sweetest note ever and got on his knee and my whole universe started spinning as he asked for forever. And I giggled yes as the stars seemed to twinkle just for us.

I thought my heart would nearly burst.

But in the movies, that’s the part where the story ends. The lights turn on.

The living of love gets lost in the credits.

There was the day he met me at the hospital, and held my hand through the tests and the needles and the pain aching for the baby we never got to hold. And though I couldn’t breathe past the tears, I never did suffocate with him by my side.

And when the babies did come, He was the one that drove me to the mall before bible study because my pants were too tight.  Or totally understood the 100 times I called the doctor pregnant with Hunter because I felt something odd...and it was nothing.  And he did believe in me 2weeks before my due date when I urged him again that something was wrong ...so we travel AGAIN to the doctor to find the cord is wrapped around his neck and we must deliver immediately.

He never saved my life from a near death collision.

Twice he held my hand through contractions and twice he watched as the doctor sliced open my tummy. He stood with awe-filled tears as a tiny foot stuck straight out from inside. And smiled big through the weighing and the bathing and the miraculous lives changing. The scars remain and I just view them as a token of our love!

I never changed black-tar-filled diaper because my amazing husband knew how much pain i was in from surgery. 

He’s held doors open, made paper flowers and special note and gifts. He goes to work everyday and works so hard so I can stay home with the kids.  He’s taught Hunter how to ride a bike, fish and work hard. He’s wrestled and tickled and shared his love for motorcycles. He’s carried us when we were too tired or too weak or to heartbroken to stand. Though sleep-starved himself and tired from work, he’s calmed our little ones through sickness or fears. 

He's never saved me from a collision ....thank God

Yet every weekday since the day we met, he’s woken early to go to a job that is HARD just to provide for his family. And through discouragement and heart bleeding, trusts God ALWAYS.  And each evening Hunter watches and listens for the sight or sound of his daddy's truck as he is busting at the seams to get his hands on this awesome man.  And every night he climbs on top of him, trying to be the closest to the man who truly loves his family.

And with kids sleeping he reaches out under the covers with a soft brush of his hand, and he warms me gentle – even when things are ugly and it seems we’re worlds apart, he’s always striving to mend the broken pieces back together.

He’s never saved me from a near death collision...Or stood in front of a city bus saving me with the strength of his arms. 

But he’s climbed stairs to come after me, and knelt right down in humility. He’s showed me real Christian love between a man and a women. Living love in the little monotonous moments. Laying down his life and giving no matter if I am wretched or wrinkled or lovely. He taken my phone calls when he is hanging from a ladder working hard for us just because I want to tell him something our children have accomplished.

And that’s what true love looks like

Like the gospel story lived out in one man and his wife.  I am one blessed lady!

So for anyone wondering if they will ever find love it does exist and the ONE is out there and you just trust and be still it will come!